Today was our first day in Jolly Old England. I’m unsure as to why they call it that, as most of the people we’ve walked by on the street are quite young, and seem actually quite hostile, but that may be because I was sitting down in the middle of the sidewalk with my girlfriend frantically tugging on my sleeve and hissing violently at me.
We started our day in Piccadilly Circus where we viewed the statue of Eros (Erotic love, teehee), walked over to Leicester Square Gardens (pronounced ‘lay-chester’), had mini-pies at The Cambridge, visited Trafalgar Square and Nelson’s column, and then were suddenly interrupted by the appearance of sword-wielding horsemen at the street crossing. We continued on to St. James’ Park, and finally Buckingham Palace.
But the most bizarre moment of the day came when we arrived back at my cousin’s home. Some chef on TV taxidermied a pig and a goose together to make a cockatrice, a mythical animal that had the head of a chicken and a snake’s tail. I don’t know where this chef got his information from.
Recap: Toured London with a chick I dig, watched the unfortunate construction of a Cockatrice.
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